Crowds of people gathered on the West Side to greet a hospital ship that could help us beat the coronavirus … if we weren’t all packed in right next to each other so we could watch a boat sail into its slip (NY Post).

As Friend of Streetsblog Eric McClure put it, what is wrong with you people?

Jesus, wake the F up. This isn't a game, people. #StayHome! https://t.co/saPpofnxT8

— Eric McClure (@EricMcClureBK) March 30, 2020

Please, just stay home. If our old man editor (who was born in a tavern on St. Patrick’s Day, thought Woodstock was too sparsely attended, and spends his free time begging any one of his many proteges to come over for a barbecue) can do it, you can!

Here’s the rest of the news:

• The Times had a poignant photo spread of the sad, empty city (aka the dark corners of our editor’s fragile humanity).
• The Daily News had more details of yesterday’s hit-and-run crash near Queens Borough Hall.
• The Post continued its league-leading coverage of overcrowded subways (with Gothamist a close second) — and the Times finally followed, focusing attention on where it belongs: the people who have to take the subway.
• Guse of the Newsuh followed our exclusive about a new NYPD policy to no longer send cops to minor crashes. (NYDN)
• Double-duty Guse also had a nice story about how delays in getting masks and other personal protection to cops, firefighters and transit workers may have led to many deaths. (NYDN)
• So the Hebrew Institute of Riverdale wants to circle its building with ugly bollards, but the better solution would simply be to close one block of Netherland Avenue to cars to the congregation can hang out and, you know, congregate, without worrying about attacks. How about it, Community Board 8? How about it Riverdale Press?
• Here’s a bold take in a Gotham Gazette op-ed: Shut down the subway to make vital repairs now, when ridership is down. It would be so much easier and probably save lots of money…
• The Times continued its war on cycling, this time in a personal health column by a writer who knows better. Jane Brody’s piece asks the question, “Are Bike Lanes Really Safe?” and wants to blame everything for “accidents,” including road design that statistics show are safer for all users, and that old trope about distracted pedestrians (which are not a thing!). Amazing: the pro-car Gray Lady can get even a great reporter and daily cyclist like Jane Brody to internalize her oppression.